Going to live together: 10 tips to follow
During a relationship, there comes that moment when you start thinking about living together. There are those who fear it, those who await it with joy and those who see it as a prerogative for marriage. In any case, sharing the same home is a very important step in the life of any couple. However, it is natural to wonder when the time has come to be able to do it in serenity, without risking that the relationship worsens, and how it is possible to manage to live together well, avoiding unnecessary tension or quarrels.
We suggest these 10 tips to take into consideration both before going to live with your partner and during the actual cohabitation.
5 signs to understand if the right time has come to live together
There is no single signal that warns us that the time has come to go and live with our partner. There are several, which may vary from case to case. There are couples who feel ready to face living together after a few months of relationship, while others take several years. However, it is not the time behind a love story that is the only important factor. In fact, before going to live together you need to know if this is what you want and if you feel ready to make this turning point. "inside the relationship.
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1. Both partners see their future together
Going to live together means looking forward to the future together. We must be very honest on this point, because it is essential to understand if coexistence is wanted by both sides. If you and your partner are constantly making long-term plans that involve both of you and you always see each other over the years, then moving in will not be as scary as many think. Indeed, it will be seen as an almost natural step to take within your relationship. You will be happy and excited to begin this new chapter of your love story.
2. When the right harmony has been established
In the early stages of a relationship, we tend to show our best side. You want to make the other person fall in love, highlighting our strengths and qualities. However, after the first period called "falling in love", you have to make yourself known to your partner by revealing your weaknesses, weaknesses and even defects. Only then can you say to know and love each other as they really are. Once this harmony is established, there will be no fear in living together, with their respective habits - whether they are good or bad - and ways of doing things.
3. It is a free choice, without external pressure
Maybe both you and your him see your future together. Perhaps a perfect harmony has also been established between you. However, another signal to be taken into consideration is that of the freedom of the choice of coexistence. This means that going to live together is a desire of both and not a force: thinking of sharing the same house just to please the other is not only wrong, but it turns out to be counterproductive within a few days of your living together.
If living together must be a shared decision, in the same way external pressures must not take over from your couple: seeing only the economic advantage of sharing the costs or the sole desire to leave the family of origin are not enough reasons to undertake this path. .
4. We are experiencing the happiest phase of the love story
After the first phase, all roses and flowers, you know both the habit and the defects of the other. This is a fundamental prerogative to establish a solid and stable relationship, suitable to last over time. However, it is precisely in this circumstance that the first difficulties can be encountered. Small arguments, squabbles and some conflicts are normal, but before going to live together it is important to ask yourself if that story makes us feel good. If your answer to this question is a firm and firm yes, then you are ready to face a coexistence.
5. You are ready to compromise
As we have already mentioned, it is essential to get to know each other well before going to live together. However, knowing the defects of the other is not enough: you must be able to accept some aspects of his character and the various habits even under the same roof. For example, it may be that while you love to give yourself a good half hour of relaxing bath to take care of yourself. than you, he likes to always watch the same TV program in the evening while you dine. The habits of another person, if different from ours, can be annoying, but it is necessary to find the right balance, making compromises.
5 tips for a peaceful coexistence
Once you have understood the signs that have indicated that the time has come to live together, it is good that you keep in mind some tips for a peaceful coexistence.
1. Establish early on how to manage expenses
We know that in the throes of the joy and euphoria that one feels before going to live together, little is thought of the economic factor. However, in everyday life, it constantly presents itself and cannot be neglected. in the new house, decide how to divide the expenses.Our advice is to try to divide them in half, obviously without exaggerating with precision and counting the single cent.
Sharing the expenses evenly gives you a way not to depend too much on your partner and to feel responsible for yourself and for your life as a couple. Begin to divide the various bills, while for the smaller expenses you resort to the classic "list" where everyone scores something or to the innovative apps perfect in order to keep the accounts in the family.
2. Who cleans what?
Same problem of the economic aspect: before starting the cohabitation you don't think about it, but sharing the same roof also means dividing the various tasks of managing the house. . Obviously, preferences can be expressed that could benefit both of you. Maybe you just can't stand ironing, while he doesn't mind that much. Conversely, your partner's weak point is cleaning the kitchen when it's a normal household routine for you. As always, our keyword "compromise" and a little willingness to cooperate are useful.
3. Cope with difficulties by speaking
Living together also means growing. Who has never had a discussion with their partner which was followed by several days of treatment of the silence of one towards the other? It happens often, but it can only occur when the couple does not live together and can take their own space within the respective houses before clarifying with the partner.
If you have chosen to live together, you must know that this will no longer be possible. Do not speak to your partner for hours if not days after a quarrel, it will only create a "really unpleasant atmosphere and a clear tension in the home. When there is a difficulty", you have to open up to confrontation and to dialogue. If there is something that bothers you about him, do not withdraw into yourself but tell him about it: this is the only way to prevent an even more difficult quarrel and to bring joy back to your home.
4. Respect the habits of the other
We had already told you that living together is similar to an "art where everything must" be in balance and this advice focuses precisely on this aspect. Sharing the same house makes you discover things about the other that you would never have imagined. He eats too late compared to your schedule, wakes up at dawn in the morning to train, takes a long time to get dressed: these are all things that you only know when you are living together and that you have to know how to accept. mate start to bother you, there is "just one strategy: be patient and love him as he is", without forcing him to change anything. Then, don't worry: surely he will think the same about you too!
5. Set aside moments for yourself
Living together is a step that leads to spending much more time with your partner. If you also start to neglect the various hobbies, going out with friends and all the other habits that you usually have when living alone, then you risk living in symbiosis with your partner. All of this can be detrimental both to the relationship itself and to any other relationships built outside of the romance. For this reason, always remember to keep your spaces, that is your leisure activities, to continue going out with your friends and not to miss those moments that you spent without him.
Having hours all to yourself will make you fully appreciate both your hobbies and friendships and your partner's presence when you get home and they will be there waiting for you.
