The pacifier and its benefits: mothers tell each other

In collaboration with Chicco

Alessandra from thewomoms.com and Francesca from alfemminile, two new mothers, tell us about their experience with the pacifier. How it helped them to make their little ones fall asleep and reassure them in all serenity and how the pacifier moment has turned into a wemoment to be shared.

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Alessandra tells us how she initially chose the soother to prevent the finger in her mouth and how, in the end, it turned out to be important when little Francesco makes some little "spite" to his mother and absolutely does not want to let her go to work.

Alessandra and Francesco: a special bond

Becoming a mother for the first time is an all-encompassing experience and for me being Francesco's mother is a gift. I am very apprehensive and for this reason I try to give a lot of attention to my little one, to give him my best and to enjoy every moment with him because I always have the feeling that time is slipping away from me, I love spending days playing with him and seeing him laugh.
My favorite moment is in the morning: Francesco is such a joyful child, as soon as I wake up he always smiles at me, as if to say "good morning mom, I'm happy you're here!" and so our day begins with smiles and lots of pampering! Lately he has grown a lot, he recognizes me, looks for me and it is not only me who caresses him and fill him with kisses, he too, who experiences himself every day, begins to stretch his little hands towards my face, as if to want to reciprocate my caress. He touches my hands, there is hours with his little hands in mine, and I wish those moments were timeless.

See also

Babywearing: what it is and what are its benefits

Pacifier yes or no? Pros and cons

Pacifier: practical tips for moms (and dads)

© Alessandra D "Agostino

Everyday life is often hectic: the pacifier helps the baby to live with serenity even the small moments of stress

Often, everyday life also becomes hectic, as happens to many mothers: too many, many times, we go in a hurry. However, I set myself to try to always carve out a wemoment made of cuddling with my son. Often, after a long day, we both snuggle up on the sofa, we take each other in our arms and Francesco looks at me with those lively and curious eyes of his as if to say "I feel safe here with you!" and I couldn't be happier to hold him close to me.
Francesco is with me at any time of the day, I take him with me everywhere, and working in a family business I have the opportunity to take him to work as well: but this does not mean that I can always dedicate time to him. When I am busy with some supplier or while I take care of the unloading of goods, for example, I certainly can't take him with me… so I leave him with my grandparents, who are madly in love with him and are happy to keep him for a while ". In these cases Francesco has an initial moment of crisis ... he stretches his little hands towards me, he doesn't want to leave me and I immediately feel guilty, even if exactly 5 minutes after I went away he has already started playing happily with his grandparents … Here in those 5 minutes, in addition to having a handkerchief with me (did I mention that I am a bit anxious?) I also have Francesco's favorite pacifier, with which we always manage to overcome the "critical" moment.
On the "use of the pacifier I confronted many mothers, each with their own experience: I personally started looking for a pacifier for Francesco once breastfeeding started and to prevent him from using his thumb, which he had begun to do ... At the time I didn't know he would also become an important ally: he prevents Francesco from putting his finger in his mouth, but also helps him to relax in times of stress and has become his best friend during our bedtime routine. And after a day full of a thousand ran, our wemoment arrives, the one before bedtime: with cuddles, caresses ... until he falls asleep peacefully. And here it is my favorite moment: watching him sleep peacefully, kissing him goodnight and smelling his hair : this has for me the same effect as the pacifier with Francesco, it relaxes me a lot.

© Alessandra D "Agostino

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And now let's read Francesca's experience of alfemminile, who tells us how her baby, thanks also to the bunny Costanza, learned to appreciate the soother for bedtime.

A new girl: you never stop learning

Before my baby was born, like all future mothers, I documented myself, I read books, I exhausted my multi-parent friends with questions, in short, I examined all those that seemed to me to be "difficult" topics and I decided what type of mom I wanted to be. Yes, I did the math without the host, a typical beginner mistake, I know. "I will breastfeed for 6 months and then stop", but now we have just passed the year of life and breakfast is still on tap. “I'll get her used to the noises right away, she'll sleep everywhere”, instead she has this manufacturing defect whereby she hears a leaking faucet in the neighbors' house (and wakes up). In short, things do not go exactly as we imagine them.

The pacifier and the goodnight: the perfect combo

With the pacifier it was no different. I wanted him to accept it, because it reduces the risk of SIDS, because it avoids the finger in the mouth, because it helps children to console themselves in times of difficulty. Yet my mini-me didn't seem to want to know. "Eh, but you have to try different ones, the children choose". Ok. We tried fifteen of them. Fifteen. Fogge, colors, different materials. Other than weaning, the menu was of the most varied, but she continued to treat them with disdain and ignore them nonchalantly. Then, after the first times of insistence (mine) and refusals (his), something happened. Maybe because we were starting to pick up rhythms and create our own routines, maybe because we met the soother of dreams on our way, who knows. The fact is that the pacifier from a simple object has slowly become part of a ritual. Slowly, while my young lady and I got to know each other, we also managed to find our own ways to do things. From waking up to sleep. And doing things in our own way has helped both of us a lot, to find our balance, to recognize what is happening even if the context changes, such as when we go to the countryside to our grandparents, or to the sea to escape the scorching heat of the city. . My little girl has decided that silicone is her material of choice and with Gommotto, after an initial distrust, it was love. He uses it only to fall asleep, the rest of the day he ignores it, but when it's time to say goodnight he becomes his best friend.

© Alfemminile

The pacifier becomes almost a playmate ... and growth

When she was little she would challenge her still wobbly coordination, trying to take it off and put it back in her mouth with her little hands. When he could he looked at me and returned my proud mother's smile - which then melted into a tear because you know, the hormones ... Later he played to take it from his mouth to mine, before denying his generous side and keeping it all to himself because it was time to sleep. What tenderness when he stretched his arm to reach my face. Sometimes she was wrong on purpose to get covered in kisses, my crafty! Now, one year old, the moment before bedtime is a different, more aware, more participatory rite. Recently a friend gave us a very nice pacifier holder, a bunny - sorry: bunny! - with a tender face, which we promptly called Constance, because between pulling of ears and biting of the nose he has more patience than a saint! Well, Costanza hides the pacifier in her tummy and generously gives it to my baby when it's time to sleep. We all thank you and when you wake up we ask you to keep it for us again until the evening.

A few nights ago it happened that I was particularly tired, it had been a hectic day, work, errands, running home, bath, baby food, chasing the babe who has never stopped since she started walking ... it was bedtime and I had just stopped her from tasting the cat's kibble, much to her disappointment. I collapsed on the sofa and in a moment of despair I closed my eyes and said to my husband: "I'm really tired". My daughter didn't do a pleat, she went straight to her toy basket, then I heard her approach with her still uncertain steps. I reopened my eyes and he was standing next to me looking at me, the little face next to mine, the lively eyes, decisively showing me the bunny Costanza dragged by the ear with her ordinary pacifier. "Dah!", Which will not make sense to you, but I understood perfectly: "Here, mom, it's time to go to sleep." And goodnight everyone.

#wemoments #wehug