Funny sarcastic phrases: life, love, good morning and many other ironic aphorisms
There are not a few studies that find a close link between irony and intelligence. Sarcasm, in fact, shows a completely unique perspective on the surrounding world, capable of providing an innovative and creative lens on the days. Sarcasm is in fact a remedy against the fatigues and disappointments of life, but it is not for everyone, only for those who are able to welcome and understand it. After watching this short funny video, read these funny sarcastic phrases and dedicate the images they arouse to whoever you want!
Funny sarcastic phrases about good morning
Sometimes there is nothing good in a good morning. For all those days when the real good morning would be not hearing one, these phrases and quotes give you the right ironic images to dedicate. Orally, on WhatsApp or by message, it doesn't matter, these funny aphorisms are always a "great answer to unwanted good morning!
Good morning. Looking for a stand-in who starts the day in my place.
Anonymous
My idea of a good morning is to open your eyes in the morning, take a deep breath and go back to sleep.
My bed is not fine today, so I decided to stay home and take care of him.
Anonymous
I would also say hello to you, but to know for sure I would have to wait tonight.
I have to get up, my coffee needs me.
Anonymous
I need an alarm clock that, in the morning, instead of messing with me, hugs me and says: "Shhh, it's nothing, go back to sleep."
Some mornings I feel the need to break the damn alarm clock but only one thing stops me. I spent hundreds of euros to buy my phone.
Anonymous
If every day is a gift, I would like to know where I can give back on Monday. Good morning.
Anonymous
I don't like morning people: either mornings or people.
Anonymous
Wanted to do, even used. Good morning!
Anonymous
Sleep, get out of this body full of life! Goodmorning everyone!
Everyone expects me to be a morning person, but I could only be if the morning started at noon.
The first 24 hours of the day are the most difficult.
Today I woke up and realized three terrible things: today is not Friday, not even tomorrow is Friday, and not even the day after tomorrow is Friday.
Anonymous
The day was canceled. Go back to bed.
Hello is a factual contradiction.
They say that in the morning you have an extra gear, but mine does not enter. Good morning!
In the morning you can't always get up and run, remember that you are neither lion nor gazelle ... and you are also of a certain age! Good morning!
Anonymous
But weren't we woken up yesterday ?!
Anonymous
I would also say hello to you, but to know for sure I would have to wait tonight.
But the one who said that good morning starts in the morning, what time did he get up ?!
Anonymous
The first five days after the weekend are the hardest to deal with.
Love is blind, especially in the morning, because I can't see anything before having a coffee.
Anonymous
Whatever your question, my answer is: coffee. Good morning!
It says "Good morning".
It reads: "What sleep".
Anonymous
Some mornings you wake up with an incredible desire to start over. To sleep.
Hello and welcome to a new episode of "Madonna che sleep che ho". Theme song!
Funny sarcastic quotes about goodnight
If you are looking for original ways to say goodnight, these phrases and quotes will help you. Dedicate the funniest aphorisms to whoever you prefer, send the ironic images on WhatsApp or by message and tear a smile before going to bed!
And then the moment will come when you will feel strong, very strong, capable of breaking the world, but nothing ... you will already have put on your pajamas.
8:30 pm: pajamas in socks, blanket and herbal tea, because life is one and must be lived to the full.
I go to bed, a few cm separate us but they seem miles and my fear is that I will no longer be able to hear you as I should. Goodnight wake up.
Tonight I feel so transgressive that I'm ready for an extreme gesture: I don't put sugar in chamomile. Night!
I took the test: “Find out who you're going to sleep with”. And my pajamas came out!
If you want breakfast in bed tomorrow, remember to sleep in the kitchen. Night!
I always think that coughing and tossing and turning in bed at night should be considered gymnastics. Good night.
I have so much sleep that I make dreams in lire. Good night!
Be quiet ... can you hear it? It is my soft, beautiful and warm bed that calls my name. I have to go and hear what he wants. Good night.
Between saying and doing there is pajamas. Good night!
My bed is a magical place where everything that I should have done and didn't do comes to mind.
Anonymous
There are nights that goodnight is an opinion.
Bad when you say goodnight to the love of your life in the evening and he can't answer you because it's a sofa.
We all have lovely neighbors who, as soon as you put your head on the pillow, start with removals, group dances and bowls tournaments.
I go to bed very late every night, and when I wake up in the morning I realize it wasn't a good idea.
Sleeping is my drug, my bed is my drug dealer, and the alarm clock is my police.
I failed the swimsuit fitting, but I'm infallible in those pajamas. Good night!
But really, before falling asleep do you whisper goodnight to each other with love? No, because my husband finds me snoring, asleep with glasses, hot water bottle, double pillow, book and maybe foaming at the mouth!
The heart says "goodnight world", the head says "it's only 4pm".
"Goodnight" and then it's still online. He did not understand that I could start the Punic wars.
The bed seduced me and I succumbed to his advances. Good night.
Funny sarcastic phrases about life
We know: unfortunately life does not always spare us from fatigue and pain. The fatigue that can follow is often dealt with by making fun of it and with a good dose of sarcasm and funny phrases to shake off sorrows. There are those who find their own dimension in jokes, those in quotes and aphorisms, those simply joking with a good dose of irony. These beautiful funny phrases make fun of life, when it makes fun of us!
I guess if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade and try to find someone whose life gave them vodka and throw a party.
Ron White
Don't treat life too seriously. You'll never make it out alive.
Elbert Hubbard
Life is too important a thing to talk about seriously.
Oscar Wilde
The biggest lesson in life is knowing that even crazy people are sometimes right.
Winston Churchill
If I were to relive my life again, I would make the same mistakes again, only sooner.
Anonymous
I like not to like everyone.
I have never made a mistake in my life. I thought I did it once, but I was wrong.
Charles Monroe Schulz
Life is so bitter, the wine is so sweet; so why not drink?
Umberto Saba
Happiness is having a large, loving, caring and close-knit family ... in another city.
George Burns
The greatest pleasure in life is doing what people say you can't do.
Walter Bagehot
Life is like an ice cream cone… you have to learn how to lick it!
Charles Monroe Schulz
"And what do you do in life?"
"I'll wait for Friday."
Anonymous
Life is made up of real things and supposed things: if we put the real ones on one side, where do we put them?
Totò
Do you have enemies? Good. This means that you have fought for something at times in your life.
Winston Churchill
I don't know if God exists. But if it exists, I hope it has a good excuse.
Woody Allen
But for those who don't get there, is there an extension cable?
Anonymous
When I hear someone say "life is hard", I'm always tempted to ask "versus what?"
Sydney Justin Harris
If happiness is around the corner, my life is a circle.
Charlie Brown
The only mystery in life is why kamikaze pilots wore helmets.
Al McGuire
If life doesn't smile at you, tickle it.
Anonymous
Life is a book that is loaned to us. And they generally want it back just when we're about to figure out the plot.
Giancarlo Magalli
The finer things in life are either immoral, or illegal, or make you fat.
George Bernard Shaw
Life is pain. Anyone who says otherwise is selling you something.
William Goldman
Life does not imitate art, it imitates bad television.
Woody Allen
Enjoy your life. There is a lot of time to be dead.
Hans Christian Andersen
The head is better hard than empty.
At the end of the day, life should ask us "Are you sure you want to save the changes?"
Anonymous
Funny sarcastic phrases about love
Disappointments in love are terrible to face, but there are those who can do it with a smile. These funny aphorisms reflect ironic quotes and phrases about love and life as a couple or married, when it is missing, non-existent or to be fixed .. . share these cute pictures with whoever you prefer and get a laugh from the people you care about, even with a simple WhatsApp!
Okay, I'm not going to be a phenomenon but it seems to me that not even my soul mate is committing to death to find me.
They say marriages are heaven sent. The same goes for thunder and lightning.
Clint Eastwood
Get married: if you find a good wife you will be happy; if you find a bad one, you will become a philosopher.
Socrates
Your soul mate is out there. Among other 7 billion people. Spread across 5 continents. Assuming she is alive. And that she is single.
Anonymous
The one who marries for money, at least has a reasonable reason.
Gabriel Laub
A wedding is always done by two people who are prepared to swear that only the other is the one who snores.
Terry Pratchett
Being compatible means having the same charger for the phone.
Anonymous
There is no more sincere love than the love of food.
George Bernard Shaw
As a single, at first, you are optimistic. Like: I want to meet a man who is really smart, really sweet, really handsome, with a good career ... Six months later, instead, you say: Oh Lord, any mammal with a day job.
Carol Leifer
What happiness is will only be known after getting married. But then it will be too late.
Peters Sellers
“You complete me” only the crossword puzzle told me.
Getting married is like putting your hand in a sack full of snakes, hoping to get an eel out.
Leonardo da Vinci
A man, if I may believe a friend of mine, always has two characters: his own, and what his wife attributes to him.
Albert Camus
All you need is love. But a little bit of chocolate, every now and then, doesn't hurt.
Charles M. Schulz
The single enemy number 1 is the friend who wants to marry him by force and only presents him with links between the macaque and a dumpster.
Anonymous
Get someone who can cook. Love passes, hunger does not.
Before I got married, I had six theories about raising children. Now, I have six children and no theory.
John Wilmot
Marriage is like a mousetrap; those who are inside would like to get out, and the others turn around to enter.
Giovanni Verga
The first man who got married didn't know. The second has no excuses ...
Sacha Guitry
Loving yourself is the beginning of a lifelong love story.
Oscar Wilde
If you think the wedding will be perfect, you are probably still at the wedding reception.
Martha Bolton
When you are fed up with yourself, get married and get fed up with someone else.
Arthur Bloch
Funny sarcastic phrases about birthday and holidays
Holidays often offer opportunities to be original, but most of the time you end up sending the usual banal and discounted greeting messages, both on cards and on WhatsApp. So abandon the idea of monotony and choose the right phrase from this collection of funny sarcastic quotes on birthdays and holidays of all kinds, from Christmas to Easter!
The best thing about forty years is that, whatever happens, the midlife crisis can be blamed. Happy birthday!
But what does "you're too big for an Easter egg" mean?
Anonymous
Middle age is when one has known so many people that every new person they know reminds them of someone else.
Ogden Nash
"What are you doing on Valentine's Day?" "If I can catch him, I'll beat him!"
Anonymous
Impossible to tell you my age, it changes all the time.
Life is like an Easter egg surprise: you expect a series of wonders and only keychains arrive.
Rudy Zerbi
The more the years pass, the more the candles on the birthday cake resemble a spirometry exam.
Do you need qualified personnel for the epiphany? Search my Facebook friends!
I wanted to surprise you for Easter, but I couldn't get into the "egg ... so I ate it!"
Anonymous
We discover that we grow old when the only thing we want for our birthday is that no one remembers it.
I look forward to Christmas to rediscover my highest values ...
cholesterol, triglycerides and blood sugar.
Anonymous
At Christmas they are all better. It's the before and after that worry me.
Charles M. Schulz
Happy birthday! It's nice to celebrate a wise person like you, so mature, so sophisticated, too deep to give importance to things so superficial and material ... like gifts!
May you survive the priest's boring speech in church and join me in the party as soon as possible. Happy Christmas!
Anonymous
The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly and lie about age.
Lucille Ball
Christmas is coming ... ready for the fateful question: "What about the boyfriend?". Good luck and best wishes!
Anonymous
Perhaps they say "to turn years", to give us the illusion of having done something at least once a year.
The years never seem to pass over you. How lucky you are ... always looking old!
Anonymous
Age doesn't matter, unless you're a cheese or a wine.
Barbara Johnson
For your birthday I would have thought of a cruise with friends to the Caribbean. Could you water my plants during my absence? Many wish!
There are three hundred and sixty-four days that you may receive non-birthday gifts and only one for birthday gifts.
Lewis Carroll
Funny sarcastic phrases in English
English may certainly seem like the language of sweetness and seriousness, but like any linguistic system it hides some unexpected tricks up its sleeve. varied, in English. Choose the phrase that suits you best and keep it in Serbian when needed, share it accompanied by photos and images. Along with these funny and ironic quotes you will also find the Italian translation!
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds; and the pessimist fears this is true.
(The optimist says that we live in the best of all possible worlds, the pessimist fears it is true.)
James Branch Cabell
If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.
(If you think you're too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.)
Dalai Lama
Some cause happiness wherever they go; others whenever they go.
(Some bring happiness wherever they go. Others when they leave.)
Oscar Wilde
Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.
(Don't put off until tomorrow what can be done just as well the day after tomorrow.)
Mark Twain
I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it.
(I learned a long time ago not to fight pigs. You get dirty and most of all, pigs like it.)
George Bernard Shaw
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
(Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity, but I'm not sure about the universe.)
Albert Einstein
I can resist anything except temptation.
(I can resist everything but temptation.)
Oscar Wilde
It’s only the futility of the first flood that prevents God from sending a second.
(Only the futility of the first flood keeps God from sending a second.)
Sébastien-Roch Nicolas de Chamfort
Politics is the art of preventing people from taking part in affairs which properly concern them.
(Politics is the art of preventing people from meddling with what concerns them.)
Paul Valéry
When a man opens a car door for his woman, it’s either a new car or a new wife.
(If a man opens the car door for a woman, either the car is new or the wife is new.)
Philip of Edinburgh
Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you’ll die of a misprint.
(Be careful when reading medical books. You could die from a typo.)
Mark Twain
I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there.
(I don't want to go to heaven. None of my friends are there.)
Oscar Wilde
I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.
(I don't want people to be too nice, so it saves me the hassle of trying to like them.)
Jane Austen
